Feminize me Please

The start of another working week and i am here bright and early, all smooth and pantied and smelling lovely. I was showing myself off again last night on my webcam. Chatting to some friends and politely thanking any strangers who saw fit to comment upon my appearance.

Mistress and i went to bed earlyish. But before i joined Her in bed i played Her a couple of bimbofication hypnosis files. Just to get Her started once again. She had on the most divine pair of orange frilly panties through which the soft plumpness of Her shaved pussy could be stroked. Indeed, we watched some adult movie clips of girls performing oral sex on huge penises whilst we played with each other. She barely held my cockette, just enough for me to feel Her touch as she stroked me tortuously towards my release. I remember begging to be allowed to put it inside Her but She would not allow it. I was to simply stroke Her through Her panties. After a while She pulled the front of Her panties out, inviting me to slip my fingers inside and tease her down there more effectively. I did so, becoming ever more agitated with Her delicate fingers on my cockette.

She climbed upon me as a i lay back and i thought She was going to guide me into Her. She told me She wanted to come on my belly. I was not put it in Her. Just play with Her and myself whilst i sucked Her breasts. I came with Her. Spent and sissified. Denied the chance the love Her like a man. Yet loving Her for doing the right thing.

This morning i mentioned to Her that it was my pill day today. I was hoping She would give me one before i set out for work but now it seems i will be waiting until this evening.

Yesterday i repainted my toes a deep red. I go barefoot about the house now so everybody sees my feet and neither of the boys has said anything about it. Although when my daughter saw them she commented that i could have made a better job of them. I teased her that they looked better than when she did them for me.

I hope the episode of me hating myself for being sissy isn't repeated for a considerable time now. I want to embrace it. The more aspects of my femininity that Mistress allows to be shown full time, the more it feels totally normal. I was standing outside earlier, smoking , and i wondered if i really would become a full time feminine person in the not too distant future. And i wondered if i would look back with fondness on the period of time between me looking for all the world male, and me becoming unmistakeably feminine. This sissy period is quite important i feel. It's a time when it may be up to me to sieze the moment. To make opportunities and not to eschew any potential changes. I must take every chance i am given to renounce my maleness. It's ok trying to be feminine. The tricky part is not being masculine.

I wore the cb3000 yesterday for a few hours. I was never going to wear that thing again, but I put it on to please Mistress. I need it. I would like a better chastity, perhaps a permanent one with a frenum piercing lock rather than a cockring. Something that could be worn for a whole year. Something that would completely emasculate me. I spoke to Mistress about a strap on last night because if she were to do me in that manner regularly and i was given to realise that that would be the way i had sex from now on She would find Herself in more control over me. Once again She said She wasn't ready for that, but She agreed that perhaps i should start wearing a butt plug regularly. I wait with eager excitement to see if that transpires.

I never promised a Rose garden

Imagine, for a moment, if you will, that you are leisurely walking through a beautiful, landscaped garden.
The garden has lush, manicured lawns and beautiful, fragrant, exotic plants are in abundance.
The afternoon sun is shining and there is a cool, delicate breeze, and the temperature is just as you would like it.
There is absolutely no pollen in this garden, as the air here is pure and fresh and intoxicating.
And as you marvel at the vivid colours all around you, you hear the relaxing sounds of birds singing, in the trees and overhead.
And as you are walking and considering this beauty and tranquillity you take deep breaths, and each time you breathe out you relax, deeper and deeper.
With each step you take in this beautiful garden you find yourself more and more relaxed.
And as you stroll around the garden, barefooted, feeling the soft grass under your feet you wander towards some beautiful flowers.
And as you approach these flowers their scent grows more fragrant than anything you have ever experienced.
And their rich colours are brighter than you ever seen.
Take a deep breath again, and inhale the soft warm and perfumed air.
And as you breathe out you will relax deeper and deeper. More and more relaxed.
And now, as you continue meandering through the beautiful, fragrant garden you come upon a pretty winding pathway which is lined with lemon trees.
And following the tree lined path makes you relax even more. Listening to the birdsong and enjoying the peace and tranquillity.
And as you wander along, relaxing deeper and deeper with every step, you soon reach a beautiful, empty beach with golden sand stretching as far as you can see in both directions.
And as you stroll across the soft sand, feeling your bare feet sinking in its cloying warmth, you gaze out into the distance.
And you see the vastness of the sea.
And you notice how the waves roll towards the beach.
Rolling in endlessly, one after another...
And you hear the sound of the waves building up...
And then petering out as they near the beach...
And you feel a growing sense of peace and calm...
As the warm sea breeze lightly brushes your skin...
And as your feet sink into the warm sand with every step you take, so you are relaxing deeper and deeper with every step...
And you soon reach the wet sand near where the sea begins...
And you notice how much louder the sea is up close as wave after wave rolls towards you...
And your feet now sink down deeper than before.
Into the wet sand…
And when you reach the sea you venture forward allowing your toes to gently test the water...
And it is slightly cold at first...
But soon warms as you take a few more steps into the water...
And as you allow the waves to roll over your feet and ankles...
And then retreat again... You breathe in the fresh salty sea air...
And relax deeper and deeper...
And after a while you stroll back up the beach...
You find a most inviting deck chair which is there, especially for you.
And there is a sunshade and a table...
And your favourite refreshing drink is upon the table...
And as you adjust the sunshade so that it’s just right for you.
You lie back in the chair with your drink...
And as you take a deep breath once more... You relax deeper and deeper still as you breathe out...
And as you gaze out at the calm blue sea you see the waves lapping lazily on the beach...
And hear the sound of the seagulls up above...
You notice a fishing boat in the distance , with its colourful sail...
Gently bobbing up and down...
The afternoon sun is shining brightly...
The sky is clear cobalt blue... Not a cloud. Not even a wisp....
And you are feeling more and more relaxed...
As you doze in your deckchair, with not a care in the world, at this moment in time...
And you take a deep breath once again. And as you breathe out you relax deeper and deeper.

Hair Today

Mistress txtd me this morning to tell me She is hoping to buy me a wig today, and some false eyelashes and some new stockings. I'll wait to see what transpires because daughter is shopping with her also so there may not be the opportunity to buy a wig.

I need to plan this weekend because if i don't i will find that my own self absorption will result in my neglect of Mistress' training and that would be a waste especially as She has shown an interest in restarting the hypnosis sessions.

We had already decided not to meet up for lunch today because Mr A had told us last week that he was too busy etc, so it came as a surprise when he asked me this morning if we were still going for something to eat today. I told him that Mistress had decided to go shopping instead. I wish he'd make his mind up.

The response to my male persona appearing in yahoo chat the other night has been varied, and in some cases surprising. I've found that some of the people who come across as "tg friendly" or whatever the in vogue term is today really have trouble in understanding that a transvestite is a man.

what an exciting prospect this evening. Doing my cam model thing, only this evening it's possible that i may be in makeup and jewellry and wig. I wonder what style Mistress is looking for. She knows i favour a bob. In my natural colour, blonde.

I hope She remembers tonight is my pill night too.

Hot Wife

Mistress has agreed to a new course of hypnosis. Previously She responded after only one week of listening to files. I have suggested She get an ipod so that I can record some subliminals for Her over Her favourite sounds.

It's never easy coming up with a fresh set of truisims and suggestions for a new trance file - especially as i have not yet decided upon the nature of Her transformation. Her previous forays involved the bimbo file and the perfect wife file and She showed favourable response to both.

I will perhaps look at combining both of these "alters" into a Hot Wife file. this should keep Her fresh and pretty. Well dressed but hardworking and almost continuously thinking about sex. her priority will be Her family and Her sissy, keeping all happy , whilst also looking hot and attractive to both men and women.

I did once play a naughty trick on Mistress once and slipped a rule into one of my files whereby She would feel compelled to stare at mens crotches whenever the opportunity arose.

Meanwhile i will continue to develop my own personal files with the intention of making my ongoing sissifcation seem the most natural thing in the world. Which, of course, it is.

I noticed last night She is still wearing the CB3000 key around Her neck. We really need to find a local chastity slave.

CB3000

i smell so girlyfied. Sat here at work, very early. I slept in my cb3000 again last night. It seems Mistress would rather i didn't use my cockette just lately. I had an argument with the dutchman and have decided that he is too much like hard work. Haven't told Mistress yet but She will find out soon enough anyway when he continues to send Her whining emails.

Getting nervous about the Bazarre now. Not really sure that Mistress wants to go. She has not mentioned it for a fortnight except when we talking about getting me pierced or tattooed.

i just don't want to appear pushy so i have to find "sub space" and stay there for long periods. Accepting my place. Accepting my chastity and my increased femininity. Working at my desk, with my legs squeezed together like a horny secretary. Wishing i was still in chastity because i really want to touch myself. God i cannot wait to get home already and i have only been here one hour.

I am currently mulling over a new feminization hypnosis file and will ask Mistress if She would be kind enough to pose with me for a few relevant pics and vids. And also if She voice some new truisms. yummy.

Hypnosis

i have been interested in hypnosis for a few years. here's a couple of files i made that i use on myself quite often. They are designed for me but they may well work on the particularly suggestive, including females. Please do not complain if they affect you as you have been warned and if they make you want to be my slave then you will have to join the queue. Trance is nice but it can also be addictive.