Depression and stuff

I guess if you suffer from depression you'll know where i am coming from. I had a nervous breakdown 8 years ago. and the doc put me on anti-depressants. I am not on them now as I don't feel like i did then all the time. Just sometimes. Most times i am fine and then all of a sudden i can feel like there's something terrible about to happen. That's the only way to describe it, the feeling of impending doom. It must be chemical. Anyway, right now i just feel like slumping in my chair. A bit tearful. Not really sure why. Not looking forward to this evening like i usually do. Not wanting to move. Just really really low. Hopefully it wont last. Perhaps i will take the dog for a walk later if this feeling doesn't lift and if her hips are looking ok..
Mistress txtd me and said I could have a nice bottle of wine tonight instead of the usual plonk i drink. Hopefully i will be able to be upbeat when i pick Her up or She will think i am in a mood. Ok so i am in a mood but i have no idea why. Think i will start the tea. At least peeling onions i will have an excuse for runny eyes and nose.